A Little Too Not Over You
by Alex2026
Summary: I fell for her knowing that she loved him and me...I fell for her not even knowing how it happened...All I know is that I love Her and need Her...All I want is to be Her's...Femslash, Alice/Bella
1. Preface

**Hello! Um, this is my first Twilight Fanfiction, so have patience with me please. It's a Femslash, so if you don't like it, don't read it. I hope you like it even if it is short.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, it belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just borrowing.**

**Enjoy.**

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It never crossed my mind that maybe one day I would actually fall in love, or just love, someone that wasn't Jasper…It never crossed my mind that after nearly a century of being together, husband and wife, that he would let me go just so I can be happy…But what really never crossed my mind was the reality that I was falling, and falling hard for this human girl…She was just beautiful…Breathtaking. She was everything. She completed me in ways, which Jasper and I knew, he couldn't. She was what I really needed to be happy. She was my drug…I couldn't get enough of her. Every moment that she wasn't with _him_, I was. I was always there for her when _he_ would just disappear in the night. She loved _him_. And I despised _him_. He never understood what she really needed. He didn't understand her. But what really got to me was that he really loved her. Even if he was selfish most of the time, he really did love her.

But she also loved me. More than him, she doesn't even know, but the feeling is there. She loved me. But I couldn't handle the pain of seeing them together everyday at school, I couldn't handle the pain of every touch, every kiss that they shared…I couldn't handle the pain of hearing his never ending speeches of love every time he got home for her. I couldn't stand being a secret, I couldn't take the pressure of hiding my thoughts from him…I couldn't stand the visions of the future…Never being able to be with her because of him…And even if I did despise him, I couldn't stand the guilt that I felt every time I came back from her, giving her what he wouldn't give her, and look at him smile by just thinking of her…I couldn't stand the pain of being used. My heart may had stopped the minute I became a vampire, but that doesn't mean I don't feel…I couldn't take it anymore…I was suffering and I was, unintentionally, ripping my family apart. I couldn't and can't take that anymore…

That's why I let her go…Well, that's what I thought I had done…The night of one of my regular visits, I told her…I told her I couldn't take the pain and that she had to decide. Him or me…And of course she choose him. To say that it hurt to hear her response is a complete understatement. I felt as if my life had no more meaning…That I didn't have the right to exist…That I should die. I couldn't go home for a while, scared that he would find out because of the minds weakness…But Jasper found me…He held me and told me everything was alright and that everything was going to work out. How much I wanted to believe him…But I couldn't. It was too hard to believe…It was one of those dreams that just never happens.

When I finally got home, I couldn't hate him. He was there waiting for me…He was my brother and I could never hate him. He held me and tried to make me feel better. He tried his best to understand what had happened. I told I had a fight with Bella and that was it. He laughed at that moment.

"Silly Alice, do you think she can actually hate you? I find that unbelievable." If only he knew.

At school, I didn't look at her; I didn't sit with her at lunch. I didn't even say "hi". It was as if she never existed. I was going to do my best to let her go, to forget everything we shared, everything she let go.

I was just leaving my last class for the day, when I saw her. She was with him, hand in hand walking to his silver Volvo. They exchanged a couple of words and than he left, making his way back into the school. She probably left something. I kept walking toward my yellow Porsche that was parked right next to his car. As I was about to open my door, she stopped me. Her warm hand grabbed my cold one. I didn't turn to face her, and when she understood that I wasn't going to move, she turned me to face her. My gold eyes meet her chocolate gaze. I was lost once again in her beauty. A beauty she didn't understand. Stubborn human. Only been holding her eyes for a few second, I let my gaze fall. I didn't want to give in again. I had to be strong. I had to. My forced my hand out of hers and I noticed that her eyes fell to the ground. I hated to see her like this, but I had too.

"Bel…"

"Alice, I'm sorry…I really am sorry, I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know…" she sounded torn, and I noticed, when she looked at me, that she was crying…I made this angel cry. What have I done?

"Bella, we both need time to think about what we truly want. When you finally find out, I might be there…I all depends on what you choose." I turned away from her; he was making his way back. I got in my car and left the parking lot, and as I looked back, she was watching me leave once again…That's when I saw her lips move…

'_I love you.'_ But I knew it was to good to be true, just when he got to her, they kissed, and I escaped my torment.

I made my way to the beach. It was the only place where I could be alone and where I could remember. Remember how this all began....

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**I hope you liked the beginning. I will update soon since my life is boring and I have lots of time. Please R&R. And I would appreciate. Even you have any constructive criticism please write it down. Thank you once again for reading.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Hey, sorry that I took my time, just had a small writer's block. I would like to thank all of you who read the preface of the story, and also would like to thank those who took their time to leave reviews. Than you all very much. I hope you all like this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga, Stephenie Meyer is the owner.**

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**1 year and 2 months ago…**

It was like any other night for me. Jasper and me lying together on our bed, intertwined in a deep embrace. All the nights that weren't hunting, were spent like this. Holding each other in complete silence. We never needed to talk to understand each other, it was part of us. We understood each other with just looking into the others eyes. It was love, or at least that's what I thought.

Just another regular normal night. Well, again, that's what I thought…I began to feel the buzzing sensation that I always got when I was being dragged into one of my visions, and like always, I didn't resist. Within two seconds tops, I was away in my vision.

It looked like any other night. Same bed, same cream colored walls and same designer bed. But even if I knew I was in my room, I couldn't help but feel kind of strange…I was looking towards one of the window walls my room possessed. I felt myself being hold from behind but they weren't the same muscular arms that I was used too. Even if the held on as tight was him, the arm was too small to be compared to Jasper's. I leaned into the hold I was in and felt breasts tight against my back. It sent shivers down my body. I was tempted to look at the person that held me but I was too scared, knowing it wasn't Jasper. And than I heard it…The most beautiful, angelic voice I've ever heard…Even more beautiful than Jasper's southern voice that made we weak to my legs. But this voice made me want to melt. It made me fell something different.

"_Alice…" I turned to her sweet voice, and than I saw her. An angel, I think. She was beautiful. I just couldn't believe I was in her presence. The most perfect heart shaped face I've ever seen, the most silky, brown hair, I've ever touched. The most luscious red lips that tempted me to touch it with mine. And not to mention those captivating eyes. Chocolate brown… She was stunning. I couldn't take my eyes off her. And once again her angel like voice spoke._

"_Alice, I love you. I need you…" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. She loved me? I don't even know who she is…But she loves me and I knew that if I had a heart, it would've stopped at those words. She what to me off guard where my own words…_

"_I love you too. I'll give any thing you need." I saw her faint blush in her cheeks, making her pale skin brighten. And with that we cut the space in between us and our lips touched. It was the most magical feeling I've ever felt in my life, not even Jasper could make me feel this._

I shivered when I got out of my vision. My breath was deep and shallow. I…What was that? Who was that girl? Who was that angel? These and a lot more questions filled my mind, but a small pressure brought my out of my mindless questioning. At look up at the source of the touch, and my eyes met Jasper's curious ones.

Jasper…What was I going to do, I know he wasn't Edward to read my mind but he always knew when something was wrong. Even without using his power to feel my emotions…

My emotions…He knew from the minute I was her in my mind. He felt the love radiate from my body and knew it wasn't for him. How could've I been so stupid to not be able to control my emotions in the slightest bit. He deserved better from me. I felt guilty for the first time I in my whole life shared with him. I loved him, but I couldn't deny the fact that I was already falling for the human girl from my vision. A human girl I don't even know…What's wrong with me?

He sighed and broke our gaze for a spilt second before returning to look in my eyes. Immediately I could see the understanding in his eyes. We both knew what was going to happen, but he still held me tight to his body, reassuring me that everything was going to be alright. I felt another wave of guiltiness emerging from my body. He deserved better than me. But not even five seconds had passed when I felt a wave of calmness surface and dominate my feelings. He didn't want me to be guilty, but how?

"Alice, whatever you saw, it's not your fault, and I won't hold it against you. Never." I saw in his eyes love and honesty. I felt him hug me tighter, "Why don't you tell me what you saw so we can work this out?"

I took a deep, unnecessary breath, to calm myself. But that plan backfired on me…I started to sob, my vision of Jasper growing blurry by tears that would never fall. I didn't know how to start. It was supposed to be another normal night with Jasper. It wasn't supposed to be this way. I tighten my arms around him. I didn't want to let him go, not yet. I barely knew the girl, and I didn't want to lose him to something I wasn't sure was going to happen in the first place. But, deep down, very deep, in my lost soul, I wanted to believe my vision, I wanted it to be real, to happen. I wanted to feel the warm slender, yet strong arms around my body. I wanted to feel those soft lips against my cold hard ones. I wanted to touch her silky brown hair with my slender finger. I wanted to get lost in those beautiful chocolate eyes…I wanted her.

"Ja-asper…" I choked on his name. I didn't feel the exploding feeling that I usually felt when I said his name…I felt nothing, only a feeling as if I had fallen in love with my own brother for over 80 years. It felt wrong.

"Alice, just tell me. I have a right to know what making you feel so horrible but yet so happy." I looked at him and remembered a time when I used to be captivated by his beauty. Tracing my fingers along his battle scars. Running my hands threw his blonde locks. I tried and ran my finger through them and felt nothing…Not even a spark. I signed.

"Jasper, I think I'm falling in love…" I didn't know how to continue. I felt as if he would run away and never come back, but I was and always have been stupid. He would never do that to me. If in a situation like this one. I looked at his face once again to she him smile down at me.

"I know…And it's not me…Who, may I ask, has taken away my angel?" he said with a small laugh to try and make me feel better. It didn't. It made me feel worse. I felt another wave of calmness surge around me before I could even feel guilty. Sometimes it wasn't fair that he could read me so easily.

"I don't know…I've never seen her, nor do I know her name…" Wait, she knows mine but I don't hers…That doesn't seem fair…

"Alice, we both know now that this can't be fixed, that girl is your soul mate. Not me. I never was." I could hear the heartbreak in his voice. For the first time I didn't look at him…I was too scared. I didn't know what to do at the moment…I was lost.

"What should we do?"

"Well, I think we should take it slowly and tell the family that we weren't supposed to be together." I could feel his sincerity and I knew he was right. We needed to let the family know that we getting "divorced", but I wasn't completely sure if I should tell them about the vision.

"Jasper, your right, but I'm not sure if I should tell them about the vision. I want to wait."

"That's fine, but we are going to hide our thoughts from Edward if we going to go through this." Edward…I signed. How could I've forgotten about Edward? In the moment I looked at him, he would know. But how was I going to hide my thoughts from him?

"Alice, don't worry about Edward. Just try your best to not think of the vision and we will be fine." I looked at his face and I saw his smile once again. How could he be so approving and accepting of what just happened?

"Don't question yourself much." I laughed at what he said. He knew me too well.

"Okay." We stayed there for a while, relaxing before we would break the news. We were like that for what seemed forever, but than I felt him leave me side and make his way to the door.

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah."

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We were all in the living room, Jasper and I on the love seat, Emmett on the recliner with Rose sitting on his lap, and Edward, Esme, and Carlisle on the couch. We were silent for what seemed 5 minutes. I took one that glance at Jasper and then turned to my family.

"Ja-asper and-d I what to say some-ething…" I started stuttering and trembling. It hurt to fell the pressure in my throat, knowing completely that the sobs were dry. It hurt. I felt Jasper's long muscular arm make it's way around my shoulder and pull me in an embrace.

"What Alice what's to say is that we just realized that we aren't made for each other. And that we are no longer together." He took a deep, unnecessary breath, and sent a wave of calmness though the room. I looked at the faces of our family…The were confused.

Why? What happened? How? Those and so much more were the question of our family members. All except Edward. All he had was a smart smirk on his face. I fought the urge to growl at him…It wouldn't solve anything.

"Alice and I just realized this fact. We don't clearly understand, but we feel as if we should let it happen, and see where it takes us." He looked at me and smiled reassuringly. I knew in that moment everything was going to be fine.

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I was in my room, just sitting on my bed, thinking. After the family meeting, Jasper had gone hunting; Emmett and Rosalie retired to their room, as did Carlisle and Esme. The only one that stayed in the living room was Edward. He was caught up playing the piano. So, basically, I was alone. I had a few visions with this mystery girl, just like earlier but more intense. I looked at the clock that was beside my bed, for what seemed like the hundredth time in the night/morning. 6:30 a.m. Time to get ready for school; I guess…I took my time today, not feeling the need to use my vampire speed. I wanted to take my time to think. Like I haven't thought enough…I just couldn't get this girl out of my mind. It's as if she the owner of my mind and heart. I can't believe it…Well…Maybe I can.

I was already time to leave when I came out of my room, already singing my favorite songs in my mind so that Edward couldn't see my visions or any of my thoughts. I drove with Rose in her red convertible, so I wouldn't have to worry about Edward. Rose didn't ask much, just how was I feeling. And even knowing that I just broke up with my husband, I was feeling great. But, I didn't tell her that.

We arrived just when the bell rang, so we hurried our way through the halls, each of us taking different paths, and that was when I saw her…A few steps in front of me, walking in the opposite direction. I saw and got lost in her deep chocolate eyes…I couldn't believe it…Here she was, just two feet away from me…After a three seconds, which seemed like three decades, to me, she passed me and the strong wind brought her, beautiful, intoxicating, scent through my nose. I froze.

"I need to hunt."

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**I hoped you all liked and enjoyed this chapter, I'm gonna do my best to make weekly updates for this story. Thanks once again for reading. Pleases R&R!**


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